Being Indian...

I once took pride in my nationality. Over time, I realized with my conscience that I was indeed, taught to do so. My conscience - my sense of right or wrong, the rational right or wrong, not the solemn one!

Nationality, in the broad sense, is a political instrument to create more positions of power. We are taught to love our nations, and follow its political intelligentsia, blindly. It is a mass hysteria, created to imbibe partisan ideas, inculcate hatred which teaches people of the same ethnicity, background, and above all language to live separately, and so unfortunately, proudly so. I have deliberately missed religion from the previous list, not exactly because I am an atheist, but because religion could not make it to this list. Independence struggles are written down in gold, by the first rulers of the new nation - the same struggle which termed them as terrorists a few years back, by the bygone rulers. Ahoy! a new nation got created: we have a few more bastards legibly eating our resources!

Independence, albeit won sixty years back seems lost, to the color of her skin, the language he speaks, the money I have, the caste you belong to, and above all our religions. Don't misunderstand independence - after all its India's independence, from the ruthless British, not yours, fool.

And for whom? The story of independent India is after all written by our political muscles. India would not have been any worse as a dominion of Britain. We proudly forget that all the infrastructure, from railways, roads, hill stations, museums, postal system, educational institutions, judicial system, to the Central Secretariat and Parliament were in fact built up by the British. We would have been no better than Somalian pirates without a British occupation. Numerous little kingdoms would have fluttered around ... passing down realms of power down blood lines. Well, quite similar to what happens today!

Way back in history, some great men made socialism a way to equality in society, and some capitalists denounced it. We somehow caught the buzzword. But with our mighty traditions we are worse of both worlds. The range of money which is spent by a citizen over a day, varies to extents which are would put even the biggest capitalists to shame, or the poorest of failed states to relax. But unlike capitalism nothing seems to work here: there are red tapes everywhere, we picked up the easy (and worse) part of socialism.

With out basic rights getting dictates by hegemony, casteism and intolerance, elections being fought by narrow minded regional mongrels just after a quick buck, and even the head of state chosen carefully to be dumb....

... sovereign, socialist, secular, democratic republic .....

... any one ?

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Blindness

Is it only the blind who know the agony of blindness? In fact it is quite the other way. The original blind does not care for the existence of light. Blindness to a blind is like flightlessness to man. You miss flight only if you have known to fly, seen what it is.

Blindness is definitely an extreme pain to those who have just lost their vision. However they too, eventually get accustomed to their dark world. In a way, they learn to be blind. Some sell it to generate sympathy. Some are forced to blindness and used by others, sometimes themselves blind, for profiteering.

Certain faculties of the blind get unusually amplified. They feel things which cannot be felt by those with vision. They become extremely sensitive, reacting to events which never get affect one with vision. Good and bad are not exactly black and white; they are just names – extremely subjective in their meanings and values. Some words are common, but after all, the dark is a different world.

Blindness unites the blind. They feel for each other, discussing the pain which can be called as pain by just the blind, attributing all of it, and perhaps more, to those with vision. They are not bothered by the pains typical to people with vision. The one with the light however feel for the blind, and toil for their welfare. In fact, in the long term, only those who see light may realize the agony of being blind; May really forgive the mistakes that blinds make so casually, habitually.

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The Affair

I am married for about three years now ... And my wife often says, I have transformed over the last year.

I have loved twice, may be thrice in my life - but never so deeply, so madly. For her, I have learned to sing. Watched videos I've never seen before (!). Performed caricatures which even my wife has missed. I have cut down on my sleep, worked late at night, and again woken up early. Just for her. To steal just one more sweet moment with her.

People have asked me: Is it worth it?



My daughter, Mehuli just turned a year.

Unlike motherhood, which is felt in flesh & blood (my wife once told me) from the moment one comes to expect, fatherhood (I know) grows up: softly, from the awe of that little pink thing, to the joy in seeing her smile at me, to the wonder in seeing her walk, the charm of hearing her call, to the love I feel today.

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